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Sunday, September 29, 2002

Erk...

I see with much pleasure and amusment that former Prime Minister John 'squeaky clean' Major had an affair with Edwina Currie... Can you imagine how exciting that must have been?

Not to mention the hypocrisy - family values and all that conservative religious bullshit... Bonking like little bunnies. They make you sick.

Ah well, Sunday, not started ironing, must do, work tomorrow, one day to get my site up and running... Should be intersting to say the least.
Posted by Dio Bach at 19:55
Friday, September 27, 2002

Phew...

before and after funny animation for b3ta challengeBeen another hectic week, been working flat out to try and get my site ready, dodging meetings and all sorts. Still not there, and I only have Monday to get it ready (eek!)

Anyway. Took the opportunity to make a very quick B3ta image for this weeks challenge which is Before and After...

I should be venting a lot more. There is so much pissing me off in the world. Those country alliance fuckwits for one, Bush and Blair, Puddle of Mudd and my toe eczema...

Just can't find the time. Damn it...
Posted by Dio Bach at 22:49
Monday, September 23, 2002

Sorry Folks

Got to be flat out this week doing some website construction ready for Black History Month, starting a week Tuesday... As I haven't even started very much, I'm going to have to bow out until its done... Regards and stay safe.
Posted by Dio Bach at 22:23
Friday, September 20, 2002

Eureka!

flying cat animation for b3ta safety equipment challengeMy eyes are so much better today. Had a solid morning in front of the PC, and me eyes don't feel to bad. Not good, but not as bad as they have been. Bleedin' refresh rate, why didn't that occur to me before. Ah well. It's ok now.

B3taChallenge time again, and this my latest offering. The title this week is Special Safety Equipment...

Anyway, thank god it's Friday. That means it's four weeks since I escaped the old nicotine trap with Allen Carr's Easyway To Stop Smoking. It feels great, I feel great and I have a zealous and annoying urge to get all smokers to read the book and realise how simple it is to give up! IF YOU SMOKE, READ IT! It's so simple, if Mr lack of will power - me can do it, then anyone can. Sermon over...
Posted by Dio Bach at 13:49

Bloody Christians

Can't make them see sense, can't kill them... :)

Got this in e mail, made me smile...

Thought you lot might appreciate this: Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to People who call in to her radio show.

Recently, she said that homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstances. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident:

Dear Dr. Laura,
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him or her that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to follow them.

(a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

(b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

(c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

(d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

(e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on Sunday (the Sabbath). In the book of Exodus verse 35:2 it clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

(f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't know. Can you settle this?

(g) Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

(h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die?

(i) I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

(j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev.24:10-16). Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14).

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging, and we should do what the bible says. Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.
Posted by Dio Bach at 13:07
Thursday, September 19, 2002

Damn It All

Gah, just accidently xed the window with 3 paragraphs of stuff about why my eyes have been bad. Post David! Post...

The gist was: New operating system on work PC. Problems. Monitor refresh had reset to 60hz. Didn't realise. Reset it to 85 today.

Thank you.

Goodnight.
Posted by Dio Bach at 21:48
Tuesday, September 17, 2002

I Need A Holiday

Again, I'm a bag of nerves, me eczema is flaring up and I need to go a major league diet. So excuse me if I keep it swift and sound pissed off...
Posted by Dio Bach at 20:53
Monday, September 16, 2002

I'm Venting Again

Gah... check out my new blog, which is all about me moaning about Cardiff bus... Like I haven't got a hundred other more interesting things to be doing...

Posted by Dio Bach at 22:40
Sunday, September 15, 2002

Hypocrits, Cheats And Liars

Not to mention war mongering madmen... Must be Sunday, pissed of, fancied a vent, Bush and Blair you hypocritical weeds.

How can we let these men lead us. The hypocrisy of Bush is astounding. Won't do anything to sort out the environment and get the petrol guzzling yanks out of their cars. Then has the cheek to acuse others of destructuve tendencies and take the moral high-ground.

As for weapons of mass destruction. The friggin' Americans built them all and sold them to them! FFS. You want the oil, nothing else...

I could go on but won't... Its Sunday, I haven't done the ironing, and its back top fired eyes tomorrow.
Posted by Dio Bach at 19:54
Friday, September 13, 2002

Low Ebb

Don't know what's wrong with me all week. I've lost my vavavoom... Not much to say, eyes hurt like pinpricks, tunnel vision. Hence the lack of talk talkie all week.

Anyway, as is traditional, here's my Friday B3ta entry... I'm rushing here, overcome by the strong urge to get away from this bloody monitor. Still not smoking! Which is a pain as it means I don't take regular screen breaks... Oh well. The theme this week is TOYS NOT SAFE FOR CHILDREN

Friday night and I'm staying sober... Got to get up early to get me haircut... May sink a few come the morrow though.
Posted by Dio Bach at 22:50
Wednesday, September 11, 2002

Its A Holiday In Cam-Cymru...

If ever anyone's really stuck for departmental outings ...!

...So you've been to Australia and New Zealand, you've done the bungee jumps and experienced the white water rafting. That's b * ll * cks.

Cymru Chaos Adventure Anarchy... Wales's newest adventure holiday company has the ultimate holiday for the adrenalin junkie. When you arrive at Cardiff Airport you will be met by one of our representatives and transported in one of our limousines from our fleet of Y reg Talbot Solaras.

First stop is Penrhys Community Centre for a welcoming flagon of Strongbow Cider. After the 3-hour cider drinking ceremony, visitors will travel by valleys bus down into Tonypandy for entertainment at the Library Club, where joints and grams of "powder" will be administered to our visitors.

After the club has been closed, our visitors will be organised into groups of 3 and led by one of our representatives. The groups will then proceed to steal Ford Escorts and head to Ponty Mountain after high-speed car chases involving the South Wales Police force. The stolen vehicles will then be ritually ignited. Police will then chase visitors on foot down the mountainside.Cymru Chaos accepts no responsibility for visitors arrested by the police.

Day 2 will begin with a sightseeing trip to Tonyrefail's famous Springfield estate, followed by drinks at the Boar's Head at 10.30am.

The fun continues at 3.30pm when all participants head to Dinas council flats to score drugs. Visitors will be allowed to sell their bodies for sex should they have a problem with lack of money to buy smack. At 5.30pm all visitors will participate in daylight vandalism by spraying their names on all the bus shelters all the way down to Porth. At 6.30pm everyone will participate in glue sniffing in Porth Park.

At 7.30pm participants will congregate outside the old age pensioners homes drinking flagons of Strongbow and smoking skunk.

Visitors are reminded that they must shout at the top of their voices and swear a lot during this period. At 8.30pm everyone will proceed to Hannah Street, where all are expected to participate in public urination. A fight will be arranged with some Ponty boys at 9.25 outside the kebab shop.

Afterwards, cars will be stolen and our merry entourage will head to "Vapours" nightclub where members of the opposite sex will be invited to go to the car park for "shagging". At midnight everyone who hasn't copped on will meet at the bridge by the M4 and will engage in throwing breezeblocks at passing traffic (public buses are the most entertaining targets). At 3am a local off-licence will be targeted for burglary.

Visitors are expected to concentrate their efforts on the cigarette counter. Everyone is expected to steal a car and make his or her own way home.

Day 3 will be a "take it easy day" spent in our exclusive Penthouse Penrhys flat doing bongs and watching porn films all day. Thrill seekers may wish to tag along for the nighttime activity of sharing dirty needles in a heroin taking session in a shooting gallery in Trebanog.

Your fourth day will begin with a brief visit to the Job Centre to "sign on". Visitors are encouraged to behave in an extremely loutish manner when visiting the Job Centre. At 10.30am everyone will congregate in the Miners Club in Ton to drink cider and eat magic mushrooms.

When everyone starts tripping, we will proceed to Coed Ely tip to watch the clouds.

The afternoon session will start with a trip to Roy's Tattooing in Ton Pentre, where visitors will be able to get some souvenir tattoos done on their arses. Many of our previous guests have been very taken with the "three feathers" design.

The final night will be spent in Apollo nightclub where we will see a tidy band.

A bus load of Aberdare boys will be there waiting for us and the evening will end with a traditional Welsh fight outside the chip shop.

On your final morning, the trip to the airport will begin with a pub-crawl all the way down through the valley, culminating in a Hooch drinking frenzy in the airport bar. Drug taking in the toilets is optional.

Farewells will then be said and from me and the boys we look forward to seeing you next year.
Posted by Dio Bach at 13:42
Sunday, September 08, 2002

Bah...

Back to work tomorrow after 2 gloriously laid back weeks off... Bum, arse, feck and nadgers...
Posted by Dio Bach at 22:54
Thursday, September 05, 2002

I's Back

Safe and sound. Was absolutely beautiful, a truly magnificent place and couple of days. Tell you more once I've waded through the large body of e mails collected...
Posted by Dio Bach at 22:07
Monday, September 02, 2002

This Is Gorgeous Signing Off...

Ok, speak soon. Me and Mrs. Dio Bach are off to North Devon (England, HISSSSSSSS....) for a few days holiday... Please don't burgle me or stuff... ;)

Catch you next week!

Please Check out My Fantasy Meeting League game in the meantime!
Posted by Dio Bach at 01:06

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